You’re a Christian woman who wants to follow Jesus, but your boyfriend doesn’t believe in God. How do you share your faith with your boyfriend naturally, without forcing conversations or conversions? Even more importantly, how do you stop your relationship from weakening your faith and bringing you down spiritually?
These tips are inspired by a reader’s email. “I am writing to you because I am in a relationship and my boyfriend is so miserable,” she said. “I am a spiritual person and he is not. I have tried to direct him to the Lord with no luck. My boyfriend is also bringing me down spiritually. Can you give me any suggestions?”
I wrote 9 Tips for Dating Someone Who Doesn’t Believe in God for a different reader who had the same question about her boyfriend. “How do I stop my relationship from weakening my faith in God?” she asked. “I love my boyfriend and want to share my faith with him but he’s a non Christian. What do I do?”
Maybe you already know what you should do. It’s possible that you already have all the information you need. As a Christian woman you have a relationship with God through the Holy Spirit. This means you have access to more wisdom and guidance than anything you could ever find on the internet. So, here’s my question for you: do you already know what God is telling you to do, but you’re scared to do it because you love your boyfriend? Maybe you don’t want to lose your relationship with him. Are you searching for ways to share your faith with your boyfriend because you want to keep both him and Jesus in your life?
Good news! My tips will strengthen your relationship with God and show you how to share your faith with your boyfriend. The best of both worlds 🙂
How to Share Your Faith With Your Boyfriend
These four tips for sharing your faith with your boyfriend are rooted in your relationship with God. You’ll deepen and strengthen your relationship with Jesus through the Holy Spirit, and your faith will affect your boyfriend.
- Be true to who God created you to be
- Accept that you can’t be fully yourself without Jesus
- Learn how Jesus Christ shared His faith with unbelievers
- Allow the Holy Spirit to work in and through you
Don’t try to convince or persuade your boyfriend to believe in Jesus Christ. Instead, use these tips to change who you are. This is the secret to naturally and easily sharing your faith with your boyfriend — and everyone. You don’t have to “convert” your boyfriend to Christianity. You can simply be who God created you to be! And that leads us right into my first tip…
1) Be true to who God created you to be
In How to Blossom Into Who God Created You to Be I shared three practical tips for becoming more fully yourself than ever before. This is foundational to sharing your faith with your boyfriend naturally and easily! If you’re pretending to be someone you’re not, holding back, biting your tongue and trying to convince your boyfriend how lovable you are, you won’t just appear phony to your boyfriend. You’ll be false to yourself and to God…and you’ll feel terrible.
Focus on your own spiritual journey with God. Keep developing your relationship with Jesus Christ. Learn more about the Holy Spirit, how He leads and nudges and whispers and beckons. Ask God who He created you to be. Above all, stay grateful and full of praise for all the gifts and blessings God has already given you! Yes, you want to learn how to share your faith with your boyfriend so he, too, can experience God’s salvation. But, never forget or take for granted how much God has already given you.
2) Become fully yourself through an active relationship with Jesus
The simplest and most powerful way to become yourself is to get to know Jesus more and more. Experience who He is and what He did for you. Reading the Bible and praying are wonderful ways to grow your relationship with God — but it’s just as powerful to experience Jesus through the Holy Spirit.
The deeper your relationship with God, the easier and more naturally you’ll share your faith with your boyfriend. You won’t have to worry about the “right words” to say to your boyfriend, or how to convert your boyfriend to Christianity, or how to win a religious argument with your boyfriend. Become who God created you to be through a deeper, more personal relationship with Jesus. Your eyes will sparkle, your face will shine, your mind will be clear and your worries will fade away. And what will you say when your boyfriend notices how joyful, healthy, free and peaceful you are despite the stress and pain in your life? Simply acknowledge Jesus Christ as the reason for your joy and peace. And you’ll be sharing your faith with your boyfriend naturally, without even noticing.
If you find yourself trying too hard to convert your boyfriend, read 5 Signs You’re Emotionally Smothering Your Boyfriend (and How to Stop!).
3) Learn how Jesus Christ shared His faith with the faithless
There is no way to share your faith with your boyfriend without bringing the Holy Spirit into your relationship. Jesus left so the Spirit could fill us with divine glory, love, strength and power. The Holy Spirit gave Jesus Himself strength and power to share His own faith with both the faithful and the faithless. The Spirit will work in you the same way today — but only if you get out of the way and give Him room to grow bigger. Jesus Christ suffered so you don’t have to. Take the strength and power He offers, and use it to share your faith without fear.
How did Jesus share His faith with the faithless? Read the gospels, learn the practical ways Jesus responded to people. You don’t have to do miracles or create a new earth to share your faith with your boyfriend! It’s the simple little things that make a difference. You know what I’m talking about — and if you don’t, ask the Holy Spirit to show you how to be faithful and true to Him in little ways.
4) Allow the Holy Spirit to work in and through you
Surrendering to God’s plan for your relationship may be the hardest thing you’ve ever done. Your fear and doubt is normal; you want to share your faith with your boyfriend because you care about him. You want him to be happy and healthy. You may even want to marry him, to settle down and have a family.
Let God lead you through this relationship. Maybe your boyfriend will “see the light” and come to faith in the Lord you love. Or, maybe your boyfriend will never believe in Jesus. Maybe he’ll even break up with you because of how strong your own faith and love for God is. No matter what happens, trust that if you are truly in God and guided by the Holy Spirit, then He really will work all things together for your good. And no matter how much it may hurt to let your boyfriend go, you will always know that God is giving you His best because you are His child.
If you’re worried about God’s will for your relationship, read 5 Ways God Answers Prayer – Echoes of Trust.
Your big and little comments are welcome below! How do you feel about sharing your faith with your boyfriend…or perhaps even letting him go because he’s pulling you away from Jesus?
With His love,
P.S. Are you struggling to increase your own faith or grow a stronger relationship with Jesus? Read 3 Simple Ways to Talk to the Holy Spirit.